Do you sometimes find yourself at work completely spaced out, unable to perform any sort of intelligible tasks? You stare at the computer screen in front of you and realize that you have to do this for the next 7 hours of your workday. I do almost every day. Considering that I work part time, that’s pretty much every time I come in to work. There is a blockage in the pipe of communication where I work. No one knows what he or she is supposed to be doing. We just sit around and stare at our computer screens for hours. My company has no top-bottom, left-to-right, vertical, horizontal or parallel organization of how information travels. My boss tells me that the fifth floor wants me to do something that will make them money. O.K… Well… A little more guidance would help. “They want to sell you,” she tells me. I choke on my coffee and tell her that I could make a lot more money selling myself in Kabukicho. After numerous meetings, which clarify absolutely nothing, I’m creating travel English lessons to be sold on the web. And guess what, they are selling me. I’m the one teaching the lessons on camera. The running joke in the company is that some Akihabara nerd will buy the lessons to masturbate. As long as they make money, anything’s O.K. So here I am sitting in front of my computer trying to figure out what it is that I’d like to teach Japanese people about travel English and I still haven’t figured out exactly what they want.
My foreign co-workers and I decided that we should start a naked circus wind quartet and tape our performances to sell that on the web. Sure that’ll be a lot more interesting than hearing me stutter through my poorly written script in a cheap studio with a fake plant.